Preston is a proud city, but we know not everything is fantastic. So this takes a tongue-in-cheek look at everything born and bred Prestonians know to be true.
1. Holiday directions
Any holiday abroad would involve trying to explain to people just exactly where Preston is in England; before eventually giving up and muttering “It’s near Manchester’. You would never mention it’s geographically close location to Blackpool in fear of annoying your PNE supporting dad.
2. Proper pies!
You know what a Butter Pie is. Not only that, you regularly enjoyed the delicous onion and potato combo that was originally known as The Catholic Pie. It only seemed like a weird concept when you were trying to explain exactly what it is to people outside of Lancashire. If you move to Liverpool, like I did, you can dine out on the fact that your beloved Butter Pie was mentioned in the Paul McCartney song “Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey” which contains the lyric, “I had another look and I had a cup of tea and butter pie”.
3. ‘ot pot
You won’t have attended any function put on by a Prestonian that didn’t serve a Hot Pot Buffet. 21st birthday parties, wakes, engagement parties, weddings – you couldn’t that dish that Betty from the Rovers loved so much. You’d normally consume your serving, with red cabbage or beetroot, and listen to your nan tell you just how perfect Hotpot is for a function – “It’s cheap, it’s easy to make and everyone loves it. You can even freeze any left-overs”.
4. Chippy tea..
“What on earth are The Lancashire Hotpots?” This is a question you’ll have to answer many times when your friends outside of Preston Google us.
5. Relegation funeral
If you think it’s hard explaining The Lancashire Hotpots, try telling someone about the fact whenever PNE are relegated, a funeral (or resurrection if we’re promoted) take places in Bamber Bridge – complete with a coffin (which holds a creepy Chuckie doll), a full procession and floats. People may mock it, but it’s the best piss up you will ever go on.
6. No thanks Grandad…
Preston may be the home of the parched pea but you’d always refuse your grandad’s offer to try them.
7. BARM CAKES
While we’re on the subject of food; it’s not a roll, a bread-cake, or even a muffin – it’s a BARM!
8. That Bus Station
Up until a few years ago, Preston held the record for Europe’s Largest Bus Station and you like to make people aware of this fact; whilst quickly brushing past the fact the underpass was known as ‘Mugger’s Paradise’.
9. KFC fact
Preston is also home to the UK’s first ever KFC. You’ll have spent your university years
telling boring anyone enjoying a hungover bucket of the Colonel’s finest chicken about this ‘achievement’.
10. Your local
If you ever went to a working men’s club as kid, when Phoenix Nights came out you could have sworn it could have been an actual documentary set in your local.
11. Not a town…
When people refer to Preston as a town you will automatically correct them that it is in fact a city; gaining the status as the 50th UK city during the Queen’s 50th year of reigning.
12. We all know Terry
You know who petrol drinking petty criminal Toxic Terry is and more than likely saw him wandering around town while you were on a night out.
13. Evening Post
You could always rely on The Lancashire Evening Post’s headlines to capture and represent all that was happening in busy and bustling Preston
14. Political animals
Although, some would have you proud of the animals of Preston…
15. LEP sellers
You remember the Chinese lady who would sell the LEP outside Primark in town; yelling ‘Evening Post’ all day long, come rain or shine.
16. Come Dine With Preston
That episode of Come Dine With Me is officially The Greatest Episode of All Time and you excitedly squealed when you recognised Bernard’s Carpet Shop.
Everyone can keep your Diesel and your Snakebite – you grew up on Sass.
Related: Six reasons why Preston is a great place to be a student
18. A Big Weekend
Radio One’s Big Weekend coming to Preston in 2007 was the best thing to happen to Preston since Spice Girls performed Avenham Park. Unless of course, you couldn’t get tickets and then you “weren’t even bothered anyway.”
Related: 15 things you only know if you went to UCLan in the mid-2000s
19. One big car park
It was all fun and games getting to go to Toys R Us on Deepdale Retail Park until it took 34,567 hours to get out of the car park.
20. Fishy times
Your gran would drag you round the Fish Market whilst shopping and the smell still haunts you
21. The best pots
You’ll never find anywhere that does spuds as good as this place.
22. Posh meal out
As a young teenager, you’d go to Tiggis for a meal in order to feel fancy. Bonus points if one of you would lie and say it was your birthday in order to get a free cake.
23. Sticky nightclub floors
You could gauge how old someone was based on what they called this nightclub. If they referred to it as Tokes still, they were far too old to still be going in. And then your parents would telling you about how it was Clouds back in their Hey Day. You now feel old when you learn that Lava has evolved into Evoque.
24. THAT viral video
You watched this viral video and realised exactly where it was within seconds; the home of your misspent under aged drinking youth. You may have even frequented the club after you turned 18, not that you’d admit to it.
25. Warehouse Fridays
When going through your ‘mosher’ or ‘I’ve stared reading the NME so now I’m indie as hell’ phase during college, you’d spend your Fridays at The Warehouse.
26. Quids In
Thursday night student nights at Lava were a quid in and quid VKs. You didn’t care that the queue would be round the corner and you’d be barely clothed in the freezing cold, waiting – the cheap, sugary rip of WKD’s made up for it once you got in.
27. Proper food
Chips, cheese and gravy from the chippy near Squires was a gift from the Gods after a night out. Why would anyone ever choose a kebab over this thing of beauty?
28. Loving PNE
You quickly learned Preston North End and play-off matches weren’t really a good combination. In fact, before we ended the curse this summer, we became record holding losers.
29. Our favourite son
Freddie Flintoff’s boozing after The Ashes victory made you proud to be from Preston.
30. A true hero
You’re even prouder that one of England’s greatest ever footballers, Sir Tom Finney (aka the Preston Plumber) not only hailed from the same place of you, but loved it so much he was never tempted by big money offers to leave his beloved Preston.
Related: 16 excellent things Preston gave the world
31. Is that you Gromit?
Wallace and Gromit was even more enjoyable when Nick Park slipped in a reference to his hometown.
32. Unhealthy city
Preston rarely got a shout out in the national media so you had to take what you could get.
33. Petty crime
Wherever you have moved to now, the crime rate will never be as bad as it was in Preston during your youth.
34. On the defence
If you don’t live there anymore, you may mock your place of birth now and again but God forbid anyone else from outside your city does – unless they want a rant filled with fun facts about the home of the UK’s first KFC.
Zoe Yvonne Delaney is a Proud Prestonian, now living in Liverpool and regularly found boring Scousers with facts about her hometown.
What do you make of Zoe’s list? What would you add? What makes you proud of Preston? Let us know in the comments below
Original version published here.